Ok, I have to brag a bit on my son here 🙂
I have been in awe of what God is doing in Lewis’ heart lately….How much of a transformation there has been in both of us….How much God has taught him and me. I am so thankful to have had Lewis as my firstborn son. He has changed so very much in me. It was a challenging road with him, with a clashing of wills oftentimes. It was a fiery road 🙂 My heart has been transformed, in many more ways than it would have been if Hannah had been our first born child! I feel so bonded with him through all our trials. I feel as though God has taught me so much about His child and about God Himself as the Ultimate and Perfect parent. Oftentimes, throughout this journey the past 3 1/2 years of parenting Lewis, in the toughest moments of parenting him, God has shown me glimpses of the boy Lewis would be. Now, it is more often than not that I see him shining through. What a really tough road this has been though! I am so thankful it is mostly transferring to the past now.
The greatest lesson I have learned in parenting, as I have searched high and low for what I thought were the “best” parenting strategies…I discovered that even though I was seeking to “train my child up in the way he should go,” nothing happened without the Lord’s enablement, guidance, and blessing. Oftentimes, the Lord had me in a place where I was doing everything I thought He wanted me to with Lewis, but sometimes it would work, and other times, nothing would work. I was confused. I was pouring out, seeking, crying out to God for guidance, etc. Although, God always answered my prayers to shepherd my child’s heart, He changed my focus from relying on parenting strategies, to God HIMSELF. I now know that even while I don’t exhibit the best parenting techniques, as long as I am giving all I can, God meets me where I am. It is to HIM I look to for everything. I don’t have to have the best techniques…and even if I exhibit good ones here and there, nothing happens without the Lord’s blessing. And transformation of hearts never comes from strategies or techniques…it happens from God Himself. He is the heart transformer!
I am so proud of my big boy. He has the most amazing brother’s heart I have ever seen. He is an incredible helper to me. He loves us being together as a family. He has been transformed to have an obedient, respectful, and gentle spirit. He has a huge need for God. I cannot believe the capacity he has to worship the Lord at 3. He often thinks of God. He is usually talking about Him in some fashion (whether it makes sense or not!). He loves dancing and singing to the Lord. He has a joyful heart. He understands so very much. Just the other day in the car he said to me…out of the blue, “Mommy, God and Jesus are amazing.” I said, “Why are they amazing?” He replied, “Because they love us so very much.” All in a nutshell…from the mouth of a babe 🙂
What a sweet, gentle, loving boy Lewis has turned into. I am in awe of the changing dynamics in our littles right now. They are becoming transformed by Him, for His purposes. And I get to watch it all happen before my eyes. We are covered in His grace…His overwhelming Grace.