My son is totally pushing me way outside my comfort zone right now. He is 3 and needing VERY firm boundaries (and very little options!). I like consistent and firm boundaries and strict discipline…but also loving and gentle and joyful parenting. However, my little tyke likes to push the boundaries EVERY day. He tests me all the time. I do not like parenting him the way God is calling me to parent him right now. The other day, he pushed me way past the acceptable limit of behavior in our home. God led me to come back in a very firm way. I really didn’t like it. I didn’t want to do it! But, I obeyed and the results were astounding. It was one of those instant feedback moments of parenting. I saw an immediate change in his behavior. I know parenting Lewis in this way is only for a time (I truly hope!).
Today was another really tough day with Lewis. God showed me how far we have come….but also how far we have to go. It was truly humbling (and very upsetting). He requires SO MUCH work. It is endless and completely exhausting. BUT, as a friend commented recently, God knows how much I can handle and He has given me a second child who is completely independent, quiet, and easy (since she got over her colick!). I don’t know what I would do if she was not!!!
I look forward to someday writing about the fruit my son will bear. I focus my heart on God’s redemption for him…His transformation of a very stubborn and needy boy! But, He also gives me glimpes here and there of the INCREDIBLE boy he is NOW and going to be even more someday. I look forward to seeing that consistent fruit in him. I know it is worth all the work I am putting into it. And it does take a LOT of work!