I haven’t written in some time! The kids have been sick the past two weeks, and Lewis is going into his 3rd week of sickness now…all with different sicknesses. My heart aches when my children are sick. It really breaks. After two weeks of pretty intense sicknesses, several trips to the doctor, and continued, new symptoms, tears flowed from my eyes. I was so tired of them throwing up! Each time they leaned over the toilet/bucket, tears flooded my eyes. I really don’t like seeing my children in pain….
Through all of this, we’ve learned that Lewis has an allergy to penicillin. There was a huge reaction, and the doctor and nurse were very surprised to see his huge splotches of rashes, some huge and some little…all over his body. There literally wasn’t a spot not covered in a rash. My little champ said he wondered if it would be the biggest, baddest rash they’d ever seen 🙂 God gave me a spirit of strength through it all, despite moments of sorrow for my littles…but we have mostly overcome our sicknesses now 🙂 We are praising God for His continual healing. I reminded Lewis of what it would be like if our sicknesses or injuries never healed…Brian said, it would be sort of like leprosy. Later that day, Lewis’ school work had stories of leprosy in them, bringing the picture to us in full circle, of what it would be like without Jehovah Raphne’s continual healing. Our hearts were full of thanksgiving.
My morning sickness still lingers, knocking me out completely on some days…I am so thankful those days always seem to correspond with Brian having a bit of time here and there to take the kids out to play. God truly provides in every way. The Lord is giving me a strength of mind through being so frequently sick and tired and a contentment with whatever I am able to do that day. I am headed into my 6th month of pregnancy now, so I am truly hoping this sickness will fade away soon However, in the meantime, God is teaching me to fix my eyes on Him through my weakness and turning to Him in FAITH and Hope and as my ever-present help. He gave me a beautiful devotion last night as I lie sick, to cling to His “golden strand of Hope,” as well as other devotions and experiences to teach me my value to Him even in unproductively, and encouraging me that my anguish shall soon be forgotten when this precious little gift is in our hands 🙂
He’s encouraged me also from the struggle that this move here was for me, that with much failure comes a huge growth spurt. I have felt Him working deeply in my heart…and I can sense Him bringing about a more mature faith in me…this brings me much joy knowing this truth and trusting in it. He has to bring the sin up to the surface for me to see it and give it to Him to work to remove it from my life. My part is resisting and relying upon Him. He does the impossible part 🙂
He is giving me little bits of ministry outside of the home…which have been most precious to me. I am becoming content with however ‘much’ or ‘little’ He gives me for each season, knowing that there is no way to measure the eternal impact of each ministry He gives me…nothing is too little. Relationships are being built, most carefully, most slowly, and this is also so precious to me.
In parenting, He has opened our eyes to something both in us and our littles that needs to be slowly refined and changed more to His character. It was something that was beginning to bother me in the children, but that I didn’t quite see yet in us. But, we talked and we both saw it and chuckled a bit….and set about earnestly to ask the Lord to change us in this way. In short, we can be a bit needy at times 🙂 And the Lord is giving our family more peace and patience and self-control 🙂
The Lord has given us incredible blessings to rejoice over!!!
-We have an incredible babysitter here who also works in the childcare room during PWOC, who LOVES our children and whom they also love. She is giving Brian and I precious time together, given all the nights and days he spends studying. These date nights have been some of the best nights we’ve ever had together 🙂
-The Lord is giving Lewis a beautiful heart of prayer! We usually pray before dinner together and in the morning and night when we can, and, most of the time, the kids enjoy singing their prayer, especially at dinner 🙂 But, lately, Lewis has been interested in praying silently to the Lord and why we do that. I told him it was so that what we say can be heard and treasured by Him and Him alone. It is just meant for Him. Lewis really liked this idea and has been praying a lot on his own…some quietly and some aloud, but his prayers are SO earnest and heartfelt….so incredibly touching and beautiful to me. Tears fill my eyes as he turns to me and says, “I said my prayers mommy, but only for God to hear…” 🙂 I tell him that I know that God loves hearing what he has to say just for Him.
-My sweet husband has a wonderful group of Christian men here (close by!) with which to have fellowship and accountability. His heart for God’s Word is beautiful, his desire to lead our family, and his desire for Christian fellowship are filling my heart with joy. I am so thankful for the community that the Lord has placed us in here, with similar minds and hearts for the Lord…and that Brian has much more time to spend in fellowship than he did at our last assignment being in the field, half the time and working so hard, and the time before that being in Command and far from our place of fellowship. This is a precious jewel for me to see and rejoice in with my dear husband, a beautiful answer to much prayer beginning to powerfully unfold.
-Hannah and I have been having a week of beautiful mother-daughter bonding. We’ve had a rough few weeks with her sick…and this past week she has been stuck to my side, with an obedient heart, desiring to please and love so sweetly. Her voice is so soft and precious. Her cuddles are a priceless gift. Our commissary trips are so much fun now, as we sing from aisle to aisle and talk together about the things we want to purchase 🙂 It seems more than a toddler-mommy relationship…God is giving me a glimpse of a beautiful mother-daughter relationship blossoming and I am so encouraged and filled up with Hope and Delight!
God is so faithful!!! There are so many more blessings, as I counted them in my head today, I could’t even keep track of them…they are so continual and so wonderful…I am only able to remember the most precious ones to us of recent. We are so thankful!!!